The Yorubas have a saying that when two elephants fight, it is the ground that suffers it. So also when parents separate and go into long drawn-out custody battles, it is usually the children who suffer it – with far reaching consequences. The truth behind this proverb is what Madonna discovered over the weekend when her son Rocco had some choice words for her as the custody battle rages on between her and the boy’s father, Guy Ritchie.
Rocco Ritchie opened an Instagram account on which he called himself a “Son of a bitch” – not just an insult to his mum, but a reference to a comment in which she had called Guy, her ex-husband, the exact same slur.
It seems the couple have been embroiled in this bitter battle in which Madonna was awarded custody of the boy at the time of divorce, but Rocco has found living with his mum unbearable, so much so that on the London leg of her tour, he begged his father to come get him, which the father happily did.
We may read this, shake our heads and think “Lack of home training” and yes, maybe Nigerian kids might never be so bold as to say what this young man has said at 15 years of age (unless you want to get flogged to death, and then your soul continues to chop cane) but the fact still remains that kids get put in the middle of divorce. Pushing and pulling still does happen, not always in the best interest of the kids. Egos get in the way and young hearts get bruised. Parents say things in front of or to young children about their mothers or their fathers that taints their view – not just of the absent parent, but also of the world at large.
No matter how busy, demanding or even heartless Madonna might be, there is no doubt that these words from her son must have hurt her. Indeed, there are rumours that she is flying to the UK shortly to see about her boy.
Experience might be the best teacher, but we don’t have to experience everything personally to learn from. Give love if, when and where you can; especially to a young mind who is not responsible for any of the animosity.
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