Dear Madam Funke Adejumo ma, good morning.
I just saw that video ma, and I understand your passionate desire to teach self-sufficiency to women, but ma, you need to chill. Ha! Ma, you need to chill oh; else, this your “passion” will crawl creepily on the skin of commonsense as an eerie desperation to teach, and therefore risk making your messages reek as mightily misconstrued missives.
See ma, there’s a reason why the word of God, alias wisdom, asks that we crave both brokenness at heart and contrition in spirit, so that wisdom can profit in all we do, especially when we need to use our tongue.
So, NO ma’am, a full-time housewife with kids especially, is NOT a failure because she can’t be, in your words, “financially useful” to her husband. No, she’s stalwart ma, a stalwart who could easily pass as a matriarchal meteor expressing asteroid strength. A pillar of strength and bond.
Ma, have you seen a full-time housewife diligent in her work? I shouldn’t bother telling you that the task of staying to raise a home, in body and in thought, is as taxing as the job of leading a Republic. “Just having children” is not ‘just’; “Just cooking” is not ‘just’; in fact, “Just having sex” gaan is not ‘just’.
And ma’am, I hope we don’t have to discuss the reason why it is a SHE, not a HE, who mostly stays to do this home work? That it is not because the SHEs are lazy louts, but because a good and reverent SHE is naturally a better and wittier human manager with relatively higher patience thresholds on the home front? Oh, you know? You know ma? Okay, let’s move on.
So, if this good and reverent SHE makes a DECISION, by choice, to stay at home as a full-time housewife with or without prodding from her spouse, she is actually giving more than one million to her husband, and, as a result, providing priceless value to the society.
Then Mummy, I’ve seen a couple of your videos before now, and Ma, it seems you’ve got this penchant to heavily link your view of self-sufficiency in the woman/wife to a swathe of money they can work for or bring to the table; that success at wife-hood is directly proportional to financial input.
Hmmn, Madam Adejumo, have you heard the term “Mental Independence” before Ma? You have? Ehn? Mi ò gbó Ma, you haven’t? Okay.
See Mummy, mental independence – defined as pronounced – is the true metric of self-sufficiency in matrimony. Not money, especially for the (religion-robed and culture-cloaked African-Nigerian) woman.
Humour me Mummy, you haven’t seen women who are smart at work but rubes at home? Or women who slave to bring in the money only to hand it over to awon Daddy wa, who in turn splurges the money on pánda (fake gold chains) and owambe-shenanigans? Women who still stay in cancerous couplings like that for the stupefying awe of social correctness, while their peace pales?
Well Mummy, that’s what labels do. Labels create limitations and stifle independence. And blanket statements like the ones you made in this latest “viral” video of yours encourage this huge misnomer, thus, making some unsuspecting demographic of your women and men audience careen into steeper ignorance. We can preach ways by which our women folk can strive to be mentally independent: a point at which what they decide to do with or for valuable resources such as time, money, career, etc will be within the safe confines of freedom.
Lakotan, as I said in the first paragraph ma, I understand you. You’re passionate about seeing women liberated from the shackles of suffering, but Mummy, please let us watch the tone and delivery. Let wisdom in the form of discretion guide your tongue from the abundance of your heart and teach your passion to understand time, and timing.
Yours sincerely in love,
Sayo Aluko, one boy that knows nothing!