A Relationship is for adults, not for kids. If you’ve not developed yourself mentally and psychologically, please, stay away from intimate relationships.
By intimate, I don’t mean sexual relationships, I mean relationships meant only for adults, where trust and sacrificial love exits, where decisions will be made based not on emotion or I Too Sabi but based on practical Reality.
We have too many kids in intimate relationships these days, and some go as far as trying to mould the other person into who they are… Mbok, it doesn’t work like that!
If you’ve not come to realise that when someone is dating or courting you, it doesn’t mean they’ve lost their individuality, please, go and buy a puppy or kitten that will do your every bidding. Adults have a mind of their own, and are allowed to use it, don’t compel them to your own ways….that is sorcery.
If you love someone, you should love who they are, their internal natural makeup…. You can’t claim to love someone but dislike their nature. If they are extroverts, love them so…. If they are introverts, love them so.
If you feel a need to change them, first, don’t see it as you changing them, rather see it as you helping them adjust a bit, while you adjust a bit too. You’re not perfect for them just as they’re not perfect for you, the job should be on both of you!
Compelling someone you love to behave in certain ways will only make them a fake version of you, and and keep them unhappy. Allow them to be real, then learn to love them in their imperfections, flaws, shortcomings, weaknesses and excesses.
Trying to compel your partner to behave or live just like you is a sign of insecurity. When people are their real selves around you, you enjoy what love bond you share with them.
Thanks for reading!
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