The real Cinderella story


Did you know that in the original Cinderella story, even though it ended in happily ever after, there was no fairy god – mother and no clock at midnight deal? The circumstances surrounding the story were also somewhat brutal and horrific.

Cinderella’s mother died and was buried yes, but instead of some magic from a fairy, the young maiden actually grew a tree where her mother was buried. Yes, Cinderella was an Igbo geh dhat af her own personal Chi (god). Shebi they used to tell you people that we Igbos are everywhere, but you don used to come and hear word. Nonsense!

The whole ball and what not was true but in the story Cinderella went thrice and each time escaped as the badoo that she is. Tomb Raider’s Lara Croft cannot match her. She even escaped armed bouncers like a boss. Gbe gbe! 
To get her wonderful clothes and shoes she would go to the grave and sing native Igbo songs and birds and magic something used to come and make it happen. Same for helping her with chores her evil step – mother gave her.

When the mumu prince was now finding her to wia shoe, it came to the turn of the two step sisters. The first one chopped off her toes to fit into the shoe. She wore it and was going inside carriage and the idiot prince was apparently so dense and sex starved he did not notice she was bleeding all over the place.
It took two of the magical birds inside tree to sing it as they were passing for him to notice she was bleeding to death.

See what konji can do to somebody who already does not have sense? Shey when I tell you ladies to open eye, e dey turn to fight? Anyway, na so them turn back. Second sister did not fit so she chopped off her heel to make her leg enter and the idiot prince made the same mistake, till those busybody birds sang again.

This is the prince everyone wants to marry?

Like seriously?

Somebody that does not know when his companion is about to die from blood loss?

Dear ladies, if he cannot see ya dying, please no do. Na ode be dhat.

He sha went back and eventually after gragra Cinderella Obioma wore shoe and it was her size. Wedding reach and the mutilated sisters want to cozy up to her and be favored in the kingdom. Cinderella is not shown to be angry or petty but guess what? As they are entering the church to wed, two birds swoop down and pluck out one eye each of the sisters. When the wedding was over and they all came out of the church, the birds did the same for the second eye of each sister.

Ignoring the obvious Quentin Tarrantino style plot where all of a sudden sweet singing birds turn to flesh eating demons from hell and why two people can have one eye plucked out and everyone, including the now eyeless victims enter the church to continue doing wedding things till they finish and come out, and get the other eye taken out like the last cookie in a jar, wakanda freaky story is this?

Didn’t see that coming now did ya?

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