I woke up this morning to a lot of fuss about Steve Harvey. Apparently, he messed up big time by crowning the wrong contestant as the winner. For a full 4 minutes, Miss Colombia was doing her pageant wave and her pageant smile until the MC corrected his mistake and crowned the real winner, Miss Philippines, as the winner with Miss Colombia being relegated to the position of first runner-up.
6 hours old and over 4 million views on YouTube. You people too like bad tin LOL. If na me be Steve, I would point blank refuse to apologise. They must make another crown o, this is arrant nonsense! 😆
This didn’t phase me though: not Nigerian news, not Viva Naija’s concern per se.
My people, my people: who/what was the Nigerian entry for this competition? Firstly, let’s talk about her entire look and profile. Ladies and gentle moi-moi, here is the woman who represents beauty in your country:
“Harpo! Who this woman?!” – popular line from the film The Colour Purple, but oh so relevant here. I’m struggling to place her features as Nigerian, but then again, I’ve not met every single Nigerian, so what do I know?
Her name is Debbie Collins. Not Ayinke. Not Chinazom, Hauwa or Rukevwe. Debbie. Not even Deborah or “Debo-Debo, Debo-baby!” in my best Falz accent but Debbie. Very Nigerian.
She was born in Lagos and lived there till she was 14 and has spent the rest of her life in South Africa. As of 2015, I have now spent more of my life outside of Nigeria than inside it, but if I were to compete for a beauty crown, I would say things that represent my birthplace. There would certainly be at least a sentence or two about eba and ewa Aganyin, but that’s just me. This young lady waxes lyrical about yoga and whatnot. How is this the most beautiful version of my homeland??
I read all of this with growing horror, but still thought “Hmmm…nothing a cup of coffee won’t put right” till I saw her traditional costume. Boys and girls, this is what Ms Collins told the world we dress like:
“Harpoooo! I say who dis woman??” Is this ME? Is this meant to be some ill-conceived version of US? We walk around with ferns on our heads? Beaded hijabs, peplum palaver as the dress and N1000/yard rags to sweep the streets of Abakaliki? Why did she do this to US? What have we ever done to her? Other than no light, fuel scarcity and the odd bit of misogyny, have we not been kind and loving? So why go out and tell the whole world that when we’re not busy, we usually masquerade round as plant holders?
Deborah, we wee not take it. Warn ya sef.
To redress the imbalance in the universe, here are a few pictures of Nigerians in various states of awesomeness taken from these Interwebs. You’re welcome.
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