Toxic relationships: When you are needed by those who don’t like you

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toxic relationships

Because someone wants you doesn’t mean they value you.

Because someone needs you doesn’t mean you are important to them.

Sometimes people fight to hold unto who they really don’t want when they see that person can finally do without them, or is happier without them.

Haven’t you seen how a man/woman fights to keep a partner whom they have categorically professed they would rather not have anything to do with? Suddenly they start fighting when that person chooses not to be with them anymore. It’s a sick form of abuse. Sadly if you’re not careful, you will mistake it for love or desire: it’s simply an ego game

Also there are those who really can’t stand your guts but need you. Their façade slips from time to time and you see the ugly head behind their declarations of undying love. I’ve seen people who can barely stand to be in same room with their friends/partners declaring their hate and disdain but fighting to stay put because they need that person somehow.

There are people who act like you should be glad they are in your lives, or that they tolerate your excesses. That’s rubbish, we all have excesses. Funny enough you may be giving more but they feel more entitled. They really do exist.

I can hate you and want you.
Maybe you add to my value, or you play some role
Maybe you are pretty handy, and help me pass time.
Maybe you add to society’s value for me,
Maybe you add to the way people view me.
It doesn’t mean I really want you.

I could need you and deem you unimportant and it shows in how I treat you.
In the words I say to you
In the way I look at you

It would show in how much I want to be with you. The times I want to spend with you because some have certain friends for the main events of their lives and some others friends only when the need for them actually arises

I usually judge a relationship with the aftermath after a misunderstanding

Do they care enough to shelf their pride and find ways to get back with you or is it a one sided memo where it’s one person who’s always saving?

Do they act like “To blazes!” when things between you two get rocky?

My dearest friend, they don’t care enough about you or what you guys have/share.

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