A true woman
This was part of a conversation I had with a guy sometime ago:
Me: you really need someone to help with chores. Washing, cooking, cleaning. You can’t focus on all these and work.
Him: Yes o, I really need a babe
Cuts him: Do u need a babe or a maid?
Y’all should choose your struggles.
I’m single and I don’t do chores. I don’t like them. Never have. I don’t go to the market and would gladly buy major foods like soups and stews if I have to.
Aside the fact that my health doesn’t work with dust, strong smells and stuffiness (like you find in our markets), I don’t like chores. And I’ve never seen how they contribute to the overall value of a human being. I pay someone to handle my chores, why suffer when your money can work for you?
Yet I’m as busy as a bee. I sleep late working on proposals, profiles, plans and inventories. Thinking, creating, strategizing. I’m rarely without something to do or a project to execute.
Yet someone would reduce the entirety of me, all my brain and hard work, the strength and uniqueness of my personality, my mind and my aura to a mop and a bowl of soups and stews. That I choose not to do them if I can help it doesn’t mean I cannot, I just rather not be bothered with those things in life that aren’t destiny defining or value adding.
And even if I cannot, so what? Does it reduce my value as a person or my worth as a woman? Many would shout, YES!!! So I have to bend over a stove, hold a brush to scrub the toilets regardless of how much I can afford to delegate such tasks? All in the name of proving myself a capable homemaker or one worthy of love? Or in the name of proving myself a true woman because having a vagina and breast is not enough? My dreams, ambitions and aspirations, expected to die on the altar or servitude and submission? And relegate myself to the background or act weak when I’m strong because religion says so?
If that is the “picture perfect” image that exists in your mind’s eye of who a “true woman” is, I beg to differ.
In as much as I believe in the traditional value system in the home, of men providing, protecting and nurturing their women, I also believe in the fact that a woman’s purpose exists as a person; outside the definitions and associations of the man. And on the last day, she would answer God ALONE on what she did with her life, abilities and talents, not with her husband or as a help-meet.
Therefore I choose not be strapped to the evil machinations of an archaic, retrogressive mind that reduces the awesomeness of God’s creation to a broom and pot of soup.
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