Patriarchy again or commonsense?: My pastor persuaded me to marry a ‘married’ rich man

Hmm.. This matter have taya me to even start to talk o! See me see trouble o!

When I come across green things like this, I am caught in the battle of either getting pissed, or painfully allowing common sense simply have reason take the bait for sheer excusable stupidity.

My pastor? Not even the devil anymore! Well, the devils are all over the place clad in angel clothing, singing the highest praises, and chanting in the deepest of tongues, so why should we be surprised??

But come o! This lady is 28 o!

A Ghanaian woman revealed to Facebook relationship expert David Papa Bondze-Mbir that her spiritual father hurried her into marrying the wrong man.

The anonymous woman who has regretted the marriage explained her pastor who had earlier rejected all suitors that came her way because ‘they were not from the Lord’ did not give her enough time to make up her mind before marriage because the London based man gave an offering of over GHC30,000 to the church.

“My spiritual father is my head Pastor. I helped the Church a lot with my singing. Daddy preferred I sang for him before he preached. He loved me as a daughter, and always wanted the very best for me.

He became a huge influence in my life, I realized I wasn’t able to even date any man he hadn’t approved of. He had a negative vision of any man I introduced to him as a potential boyfriend. He would always tell me, “That man is not him. He is not of the Lord. Be patient.”

I was patient till my 28th birthday, when this rich guy from London, visited us for a month. His mother is a member of the Church, so he just came with her. The Church was organising a fundraising that Sunday and the guy gave over 30, 000 Ghana Cedis. Immediately after the gentleman’s offering, Daddy called me to come sing. He made me sing for over 20 minutes”.

The woman further explained that she found out months into the marriage that her ‘London based’ husband is still married to his British wife something my spiritual father seems to be aware of.

Her supposed husband from the Lord only sees her twice every year, pays so much offering through Western Union money transfer to her pastor, bought the pastor a car and invites him to London, but not her.

“I only get to see him, twice every year. And he stays for just a month. A friend of mine in the UK tells me he is still married to his British wife. He has been paying so much offering through Western Union money transfer to my Pastor. He’s bought the pastor a car. He invites him to London, but not me”.

Read her full story below:

#TheInfluenceOfPastors

“Hi Dave. This is my story. My spiritual father is my head Pastor. I helped the Church a lot with my singing. Daddy preferred I sang for him before he preached.

He loved me as a daughter, and always wanted the very best for me. He became a huge influence in my life, I realized I wasn’t able to even date any man he hadn’t approved of. He had a negative vision of any man I introduced to him as a potential boyfriend. He would always tell me,

“That man is not him. He is not of the Lord. Be patient.”

I was patient till my 28th birthday, when this rich guy from London, visited us for a month. His mother is a member of the Church, so he just came with her. The Church was organising a fundraising that Sunday and the guy gave. Over 30, 000 Ghana Cedis.

Immediately after the gentleman’s offering, Daddy called me to come sing. He made me sing for over 20 minutes. The following day, Daddy invited me over to the house. The gentleman and the mother were there.

To cut the long story short, the man was in a process of separating from his wife (that was the story he fed us) and wished he could marry a decent lady. Daddy told me he was the one meant for me, and persuaded me into accepting him as a friend. Within a week, the guy wanted us to be intimate, because he was leaving the country the following week. I refused him sex.

We kept in touch when he returned to the UK. On the 23rd of April, 2013, he asked for my hand in marriage. He confirmed his divorce to his first wife. He has a big house in Accra, so that’s where I am staying right now, with his mother. I am taking care of his aged mother, Dave. All his siblings are outside of Ghana.

I only get to see him, twice every year. And he stays for just a month. A friend of mine in the UK tells me he is still married to his British wife. He has been paying so much offering through Western Union money transfer to my Pastor. He’s bought the pastor a car. He invites him to London, but not me.

I am just quiet and watching all of them. His mother knows what’s going on but she’s refusing to also open up to me because she has no one to take care of her in that big house. I fell in love with him, that’s why I married him.”