Single and pregnant: the girlfriend

young black girl with pregnancy test
Teenage girl looking at pregnancy test

Single and pregnant: the girlfriend: You had done everything you possibly could to avoid getting pregnant. Tried to prevent the sex (or not) but it happened anyway. Tried to bring in protection (or not) but unprotected sex happened anyway. You tried to wipe the slate clean with Postinor (or not) but it happened anyway.

You are pregnant.

Or that’s what is showing on the strip test but hey, “these things aren’t accurate so I’ll hit the clinic for a more reliable test”. You need to open the slip to know the result but reality hits and you find you already know the result. Babe, you are pregnant!

A million questions rushing into a shrinking head that feels like it would explode. Top of them, “what do I do now?”

If you are lucky, the guy responsible would stand by you. If you are not so lucky, he will give you money (or not) to get rid of it. You know, “save both your futures as there’d be more babies together”. And if you are totally screwed over (maximum pun intended), he’d just deny knowing you (believe me, these things so happen).

And your parents, oh my goodness your parents! You are dead meat! What about school? Your story in the campus magazine, the street credibility! It’s all gone! Funny how one can still think of street credibility at this point but the mind works in mysterious ways. You are trying to be strong as the clinic is public but you can’t help the tears and an attempt to respond to the first show of concern just gives way to a full blow cry.

Finally, you are back home and your housemates now have confirmation. It’s official, she’s pregnant. Let the gossip begin.

All that’s left now is for your boyfriend to come and show how much all those words and promises meant. He does come but only adds to the confusion. Now you are both left with more options than before he came. You want him to go home with you to see your parents, he wants you to go with him to see a doctor nicknamed “The Terminator”. Of course, a fight follows and he walks away because, well, it’s still better than going to see your parents.

Your whole world will feel like it is crushing around you but through this maze of confusion there’s always a path. Most times, the best advice will come from your parents and guardians. Friends will feel like they are telling you the truth but what do they know? The risks that come with their own ideas usually aren’t worth it.

Baby, it is true that you are in trouble and you are most likely going to face disappointed/angry parents. But this is just because they love you and want the best for you. If, however, you are still all alone and you are feeling very confused then wipe your tears and head home. Whatever you do, understand that the decisions made today will affect tomorrow. Time heals most wounds but make sure you heal right: go home and tell your family.

Oh, and this is not a bad time to work on your relationship with The Most High, I hear He is The Most Gracious, Most Merciful. A counsellor is also not a bad idea if you have access to one (those ones who won’t charge you an arm and a leg). Make sure that someday when you look back at this event you’d smile and be proud of how you rose from its ashes.

This article is originally found here:

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