Young and pregnant: the boyfriend

Pensive thinking sober black boy

“Sweetheart, I am pregnant”. There are very few words that a guy dreads more before marriage. But there you are looking at the slip containing medical jargon you have just been handed. Reading hard, looking at terms you don’t know, as if to visually command it to change and display the words “NOT PREGNANT”.

Your head suddenly feels heavy and you need to sit down because the night you thought was going to be fun has just gone opposite of that. Suddenly, Adrenalin pumps in and you just know where it is all going to end. You just don’t know how to get there or how to tell your girl.

Your girl?! It would have been better if she were your girl! This is the one you thought was “sharp touchdown”. Now coming with a pregnancy that will attempt to keep you on lock-down, damn it.

What do I do now??

“I cannot drop out of school to become a father. Heck, I can’t even take care of myself not to mention a wife and a child (that’s assuming it is not more than one). There’d be many babies in the future, after all, but if my own future is affected then they may not even exist. For that reason I think it is best to get rid of this one and if she doesn’t agree, I will deny now and apologise later when she has done it”

Brother, this phase you are going through is real and it is important to think about the future. But what future lies ahead for the child already conceived? What future lies ahead for the girl who you may or may not love? A lost womb? Or worse, death? Think about it, is that really worth it.

“Guy bone, nothing go happen.”

We all like to believe that and it is easy to believe as we don’t really bear any risk but brother, once she gets pregnant, it’s game over, you have got to take it. Fine, this message could have been more useful before she got pregnant but it can still get a lot worse very quickly. What are you running away from, by the way? The future president that would do your name proud, maybe?

Your girlfriend is pregnant, right? Let her discuss it with her parents/guardians (don’t think that there won’t be anger/disappointment). You are better off with them being involved in the decision-making which also saves you a lot of risk. It has happened and it has happened. You got here because you made a bad call on sex. Do you deserve to make another bad call on the baby? No, you deserve better.

Last last, na that parent/guardian option sure pass, street cred go burn but it’s your best bet. See now, she told you no to sex but you insisted, she said use a condom but you forced your way, now e don happen. Anyway, no time to waste on blames, let’s get this sorted out first. You both need to go home and face the consequences of your actions, it’s time to be a man.

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