My village people have found me at last! My broken Touche Eclat foundation! 😭😭


I try not to upset my village people. I am part Ijebu and part Delta. The jazz in both places is not for small shudren at all, so one should always behave like a shide of God. So when I heard a loud crash in my bathroom this morning, and went in to find my YSL Touche Eclat foundation cracked in two on the floor, I knew that “won ti finally geti mi.”

And then I thought – what if it weren’t my village people but other people’s ancestors? Kai! Recently, I have written articles about Ambode, Bill Gates, the Dangote wedding party…choi! All their ancestors must have joined a conference call to spoil my slay queen-ability. Is this life? Is this fair? Their lunch money is more than I have in my account and yet, vexation. Issnor good o.

I was just looking at the floor with all of my brown liquid gold spilt all over it with shards of glass inside it. Couldn’t even scoop it up; I’d be cutting my face every time I tried to do fine geh.

I’ve turned it upside down to preserve what’s left because Ijebu, but I am upset. Oya, all of you shuu sorry o. I won’t do it again*. Because my foundation was not cheap but still manageable. If my perfume breaks, the cry ehn??? I’ve said sorry o. Ehen.

*I’ll totally do it again.

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