We should never denigrate a woman’s chosen path

A stay-at-home mom is not inferior to a career mom. Purpose isn’t people-defined. It is self-defined, even if it is people-based. This means that your purpose is meant to add value to humanity. The number of people you add value to is immaterial. What matters is that in your life journey, you are able to add value to one person, at least.

It is not in our capacity to decide what a woman’s purpose should be. She has an exclusive right to decide what her purpose is and nobody can demean her for whatever purpose she has chosen. If a woman decides to raise good children and support her husband, it is an honourable purpose and she is by no means lower than the woman whoso purpose is to be a gynaecologist. They are both adding value to humanity. A woman who raised good children has succeeded in minimising the number of social vices and criminals in the world.

No purpose is superior to the other. Where one ends is where the other begins. We need to get these things right. Purpose is something you are passionate about that adds value to humanity. All purposes are meant to achieve one thing- value. This is why we should never move about with an air of superiority, thinking we are better than others. No, dear, you ain’t better. We are collaborating with one another.

Perhaps, the only problem I might have with women who stay at home is not that they have chosen that vocation, but that most don’t do it with a sense of purpose. We have a lot of women who stay at home not because that is what they really want but because of family/societal indoctrination and patriarchal restrictions. These group of women stay at home and do the “full time house wife” business. If a woman is staying at home out of her own volition without being mandated to do so, and does it with a sense of purpose; you are not better than she is.

If a woman can raise her children to become responsible adults that will be productive in the society, she has achieved a lot. We must also note that success is relative and it is rated based on purpose. What you consider as success may be regarded as unimportant by another person. When we talk about great women, it will be unfair if we do not include women who successfully kept their homes and raised good children. Just so you know, raising kids and keeping the home is not an easy task.

A woman should be proud to say that she is a full time house wife without feeling little in the midst of other women who are career women. As long as she understands what she is doing and gives it her best, nobody should demean her. She deserves as much honour as any other woman- even if it is Angela Merkel. We mustn’t all do the same things. Every woman has a purpose and it mustn’t be in uniformity with other women’s purpose.

This might sound like a contradiction of things I have said in the past but I have never made derogatory statements about stay-at-home wives. I always write to charge up those who are doing the house wife thing, because they feel they can’t achieve more. I also speak to the younger generation to aspire to leadership positions in the society. At least we all know that it is easy to combine a healthy family life and career. It all depends on the person. Career driven women are not more purposeful than family driven women
Whatever rocks your boat, go for it. Two things you should take into consideration- do it because you want to and make sure it gives you fulfilment.