Five years ago, a childhood friend of mine came begging me for money. She said she “mistakenly” got pregnant.
She had just graduated from the University the year before, and was preparing for NYSC.
Her single mum had died while she was writing her final year exams. They kept the news from her for almost a month, to enable her finish her exams.
Now, months after her mother’s funeral, this girl got pregnant. She said it wasn’t planned.
This is a friend I have known almost all my life. So, she’s suppose to have a special place in my heart.
As tough as I might look to many, I hardly ever turn my back on people I held dear at some points in my life.
I had just graduated from the University then. No much money, but I managed to wire her N100,000 as at January 2013.
Over the years, she’s been job hunting. Hustling from one N50,000/month job to another N45,000/month job. She left her child with her maternal Aunty, who was nice enough to agree to look after her baby till she’s got her feet solidly on the ground enough to look after her baby.
Occasionally, I’d send her N10,000, N20,000, or more or less.
We are about age mates, born same year, just four months between us. So, she’s in her late 20s.
Last week, I saw a missed call from her. So, I called her back.
Do you know what she told me?
She’s pregnant again for same jobless man who she had told me that it was a huge mistake getting pregnant with his baby in the first place. That not only is he a jobless and poor guy, that he is also nasty.
She told me that I should send her money to start buying baby things. That she doesn’t have any money at all.
I told her NO, that I was never ever going to send her a penny again in my life, and that she should never call my line again.
Now read these:
1. This girl is an intelligent young woman. She is NOT stupid.
2. She’s well educated. She has a degree and recently started a master’s program there in Nigeria.
3. She has been my Facebook friend since less than a month after I opened my Facebook account. She reads my posts. She reacts to them. She has read me scream and shout about not giving birth to children you can’t take care of.
4. Based on points 2 & 3, she can’t pretend that she doesn’t know about contraceptives, or the need for planned procreation.
5. I was busy trying to match make her with a friend of mine who lives abroad and who told me he was searching for a wife (and who asked me to link him up with one of my friends, since we left our friendship as platonic after we found out we are both AS… and also genetically incompatible in at least two ways), just so he can marry her and bring her and her daughter abroad. The guy had a little problem with a woman who already has a child. I was trying to talk him into accepting one step child. I don’t need to tell you that he won’t listen to me any more.
6. This is NOT a case of “things were good but it went bad”; which is the cheap excuse many of you come up with to defend those who procreate recklessly. Things were never good.
For me, I forgive one careless mistake, I don’t forgive same mistake twice.
My friend and I are age mates, we are both unmarried, but she’s busy having children and expecting me to help her train the children.
I earn more than 10 times what she’s ever earned. But I still want to “clear the coast” financially before getting pregnant.
Looks like this friend thinks I’m stupid. I’m the fool who isn’t wise enough to just have unprotected sex and get pregnant, but will help her raise the ones she carelessly brought to the world.
After I refused, the entitled idiot insulted me and blocked me all round.
Good riddance to bad bullshit.
What the hell is wrong with some of you Nigerians?
You have sex recklessly thinking there are people on earth who will take responsibility for the children you bring to this world?
I get involved in many charity causes, but one which I don’t get involved in is helping women who just had children pay their maternity bills.
As far as I’m concerned, if you can’t pay your hospital bills to give birth to a child, you shouldn’t be having sex without contraceptives.
I’ve got a friend here in Canada. He earns well, C$100,000 per annum. His wife who is a doctor earns about C$300,000 per annum. He is in his late 30s, while his wife is in her early 30s.
They’ve got TWO children. The last time we discussed, he said they want just two.
I’ve got rich couples as friends, and you hardly ever find them having more than three children.
It’s almost always some of these poor people who can’t feed themselves that keep breeding like rats. And blackmail the richer people who had only the number they can look after to train their children for them.
You birth children with the hope that at 12, you will send them out to become house girls and boys, because you have no plans for them.
These underage domestic staff become exploited. They are physically, sexually and psychologically abused.
This is how selfish some of you are. You give birth to children and dump them into lives of misery.
Nigeria is currently roughly about 180million in population, with very limited resources. We should be worried about overpopulation, but no, poor people keep breeding. That’s their only extracurricular activity to busy up themselves while rich people are keeping up late at night strategizing on how to become even richer.
I’m so tired of some humans.
I support a law on procreation in Nigeria. Like 2 children to a couple. And except you are able to deposit N20million Naira as child welfare plan and/or show you earn over a million Naira per month (jointly with your partner who you intend having children with), you shouldn’t have another. Because many people need to be rescued from their own stupidity.
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