Chisos! What would YOU do with £51.8m EuroMillions jackpot?


So Camelot, the people behind the National Lottery, have announced that one UK ticket holder has won the £51.8m EuroMillions jackpot in the latest draw. Choi! Chisox!! Laaaaaasufa Julailu!!!

Jesus, what did I do nah? That you didn’t make me the winner of this “small” money now? I mean…other than the fact that I didn’t buy a ticket? Does the Bible not say that the Lord moves in mysterious ways? Why can the winning ticket not just mysteriously appear in my purse? Ehn, Master Jesus?? At least give me the chance to prove that I would not act all uppity and that I would open that orphanage like I totally said I would?!

Anyway, while I’m checking my purse, my drawers and even my underwear in case the ticket should miraculously appear (EuroMillions people have confirmed the ticket is out there but has yet to be claimed, so I’m on my way to mountain top right now for special prayers); I’m also having a think about what I would do with that kind of money.

Even if I buy this, guguru and groundnut money go remain!

£51.8m is not a “I’ll pay off all my bills and buy that fine motor” type of a sontin. No matter what you decide to do, there will always be change remaining. Buy private jet sef, small suya and Orijin money go remain.

Even if you buy full tank of petrol with £51.8m in these perilous black-market times, no-how no-how you will still see N200 to tip the petrol attendant. It can’t fit to finish.

In fact, I have headache just thinking about it. So please, people: what would you do with £51.8m??

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