It is not about patriarchy. It is not about entitlement mentality. There are so many wonderful Nigerian men who would gladly thrive on equality and even worship women more often. Most guys who have become disrespectful to women today didn’t start out that way. Every man has a story. Some of us are still ‘good guys’ not because it has been very rosy with ladies. It is because we made a conscious decision to remain good irrespective of the treatment we get from women.
Patriarchy isn’t sustained by men but women. Have you noticed how your own woman would be treating you like trash because you are soft to her? Only very wise Nigerian women value and respect men who treat them well. Forget social media talk. It is the simple truth. Most women still abuse the good men in their lives. There is this obsession they have with domineering men. When you are not domineering, they start abusing you.
A woman dates am abusive man and breaks up. When she meets the man who isn’t, she would start abusing and disrespecting him, while she still worships the previous abuser. One would think that she would appreciate and respect the sane man, but no. She would treat him like trash but tremble at the voice of her former abuser. While this can be connected to Stockholm syndrome, it isn’t always the case. Some women just don’t know what they really want. They go about mouthing the qualities they want in a man but when they see those qualities, they end up despising them.
If a Nigerian man finds out that his woman treats him like trash and respects the men who abuse her, what do you think he would naturally do? Your guess is as good as mine.
Every day we preach to men and encourage them to treat women with value and respect, but some women are not helping us at all. Some of you don’t know how difficult it is for a man to fight a system that favours him. This is why I am naturally drawn to men who respect women. They are precious. So precious. They deserve the best. It is a simple thing. If you are a woman who has no value for a man that respects you, please learn to stick to your kind. Find an abusive man and stick with him. Don’t go and mess up a good a man and turn him into an abuser.
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