You bleach and you wan enter heaven? How angel go recognise you na?

1
Pearly Gates Landscape
Pearly gates of heaven opening to a high altitude sunrise between two layers of clouds in a landscape orientation

That’s how you will come online and see one sister’s leg has bent so much in her picture, you start to pray God heals her or helps her deal with the stares that come, only to find out say na because of picture she bend am. Let’s not even mention the changing of name and bleaching of skin. May God forgive allofuna.

Eef de babe die like dat reash heaven, dem no go stop am for gate, say she be impostor?

*babe wakaring to henta gate of heaven*

Angel: Eeeiiish! You dia! Stop! Who you be?!

Lady: My name na Citybaby

Angel: Ehn? You say?

Lady: City baby

Angel: City?

Lady: Baby.

*Angel kamoru checks the books and even checks supplementary list*

Angel: Madam, ya name no dey oh!

Lady: Oooh! Sorreee. My other name should be there. It is Citogbentrome.

Angel: Ehn? CITO?? Na Ya face be dis? Na wa oh! Ya so yellowed hin colour. Beht I dey dia when ya mama born you na. Ya black like sharcoal dat tym.

Lady: Ehn. Na accident do me.

Angel: Shuu? Accident come shange ya colour to yellows like MTN? Na wa oh! Oya enter na.

Lady: Lolzy. Tainks.

Angel: Wait. Wait. Wait. Abeg, wetin do ya leg? And how ya hand just dey one kain now?

Lady: Eesit Ya consyn? Na style na. Haba!

*Angel Kamoru eyeing her upandan*

Angel: Ehen? Na style atink? Abeg, dress do back fess.

*pulls her back*

Lady: Ahhh! What is all this harassment for na?

Angel: Madam, no vex. I go need to confam ya identity. Commot two passport photograph, write ya name and matric number for back, plus signature. Make we sure say na you. We no dey allow ghost workers and students for heaven.

bleach-skin

Get more stuff like this
in your inbox

Subscribe to our mailing list and get interesting stuff and updates to your email inbox.

Thank you for subscribing.

Something went wrong.

1 COMMENT

Leave a Reply